100 Percent Responsible

Interesting comment and interesting question.

Are you 100 percent responsible for the interaction between you and another person? Can you be? I think yes, you are. You must be. I am 100% responsible for the peace in my home. So is A. He is also 100% responsible. Why? Because I can 100% make a situation bad, worse, untenable. So then why can I not 100% make it better, peaceful, bicker-free? And why can't he?

I don't mean to say that I am the sole arbitir of moods or peace in my house. That's ridiculous. No one is. But I do say the onus lies on my shoulders, as it lies on every one of us, to remember that how we act affects every moment of our lives. And if we don't want to bicker, if we disengage, if we take it upon ourselves to PERSONALLY put an end to the stupid, then absolutely yes, peace is to be had, however momentarily it may last.

Withering Glances Aside

So my fiance A. and I spent ALL weekend together. This is rare. We generally spend most of one day and part of another but almost never do we hang out together for 48 straight hours. And that is mostly because he works Saturday nights but also partly because we bicker. Nothing big or huge or life shattering, just a little bicker.

But this weekend we didn't. Nada. Nothing. I think because I swore to myself I would try really *really* hard, and I did and we didn't. And that felt awesome. But not a little disheartening because it also made me realize that crap. its all in my hands, isn't it? If I keep my withering glances to myself (and i've got a pretty good witherer if I don't say so myself.) anyway, if i keep the wither to myself, we all get along. we go to sleep all snuggly and then he goes out and buys Sunday breakfast.

Damn it. Now I have to be good.